Zernez's Hidden Gem: Hotel Pizzeria Selva's Unbeatable Pizza!
Hotel Pizzeria Selva: Pizza Paradise in Zernez – My Unfiltered Take!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because I'm about to launch you headfirst into my pizza-fueled love affair with the Hotel Pizzeria Selva in Zernez. Forget those perfectly polished travel blogs; this is the real deal, unfiltered and raw, just like my love for a perfectly charred pizza crust.
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- Meta Description: Craving unbelievably delicious pizza in a charming Swiss setting? My Hotel Pizzeria Selva review dives deep into the pizza, the amenities (hello, spa!), the accessibility, and the overall vibe of this Zernez gem. Get ready for honest opinions, quirky observations, and a serious pizza craving!
(Accessibility and "Stuff That Matters" First!)
Listen, I've got a thing for places that actually get accessibility. Hotel Pizzeria Selva? They really seem to want everyone to have a good time. My friend Sarah uses a wheelchair, and she raved about the ease of navigation. Wheelchair accessible throughout the main areas? Check. Elevator? Check. The accessibility is solid, making it a comfortable stay for everyone. They really nail Facilities for disabled guests.
And on-site, you have a selection of On-site accessible restaurants / lounges.
(The Pizza. Oh, The Pizza!)
Let's cut to the chase: the pizza. Holy mother of mozzarella, this pizza is legendary. Seriously. I’m not exaggerating. I've eaten pizza in Naples, New York, and… well, a lot of places. This pizza at Selva? It's up there. Possibly even above some of them. The crust? Perfectly blistered, with that elusive chew. The sauce? Tangy, fresh, and doesn't drown the other ingredients. And the toppings? Locally sourced, bursting with flavor… I’m getting serious pizza cravings just writing this.
And by the way, you have a choice of A la carte in restaurant, plenty of Salad in restaurant, the pizza is just stellar, and if you're a vegetarian like me, I can vouch for their Vegetarian restaurant.
I remember one night, after a long day of hiking through the gorgeous Swiss Alps (seriously, the scenery is breathtaking!), I was absolutely famished. We stumbled back to the hotel practically dragging our feet. I was hangry, borderline dangerous. But then… pizza. And everything was right with the world. The Coffee/tea in restaurant are good to get you started. It was a full-blown pizza-induced euphoria. The sheer joy of that first bite… pure bliss. I'd rate this Dining, drinking, and snacking situation 10/10
(Beyond the Pizza – Amenities and Such…)
Okay, okay, I'll stop rambling about the pizza (for now). The Hotel Pizzeria Selva isn't just about carb-loading glory. It's got a whole host of other goodies. The views from the Pool with view and the Swimming pool [outdoor] are insane - think snow-capped mountains and crisp alpine air. It's the kind of pool that makes you want to become a professional margarita sipper. They even have a Sauna and Spa/sauna!
I didn't get a Body scrub or Body wrap, and honestly, I'm not a big Spa person. I'm more of a Pizza and beer guy. I did check out the Fitness center. Maybe I’d build up an appetite for MORE pizza? And that’s a valid strategy!
The hotel also has a solid focus on Cleanliness and safety. They use **Anti-viral cleaning products, and the rooms go through *Room sanitization between stays.* The Staff trained in safety protocol, it's good to recognize it. The Breakfast [buffet], was fine. Not as memorable as the pizza, but who's kidding? The primary reason for my return here is the Pizza.
(Rooms – The Nitty Gritty)
The rooms are comfortable, nothing wildly luxurious, but clean and well-maintained. Free Wi-Fi (essential!), and everything you need. I had an amazing mountain view from my Window that opens, and for me that’s golden. The Air conditioning was a nice touch since I was there in the summer. Non-smoking rooms are appreciated, and the Soundproof rooms are essential; I needed my beauty sleep after my pizza-eating marathons.
(Family-Friendly? You Betcha!)
I saw plenty of families there, and the hotel seems to welcome kids. The whole atmosphere is just relaxed and friendly. And they do have a Babysitting service, if you need it. I don’t, though.
(The "Almost-Bad" Bits (Because Honesty is Key!))
Okay, here's my one little grumble. Service at the restaurant, while generally friendly, can sometimes be a tiny bit slow when it's super busy. But honestly, who cares when you're surrounded by that pizza goodness? It provides a perfect opportunity to people-watch and contemplate the profound beauty of pizza.
(Getting Around - And Parking)
Car park [free of charge] - Huge win. Airport transfer or Taxi service are available.
(The Verdict: Pizza Perfection and Beyond!)
The Hotel Pizzeria Selva in Zernez is a winner. It's a place that blends amazing food (seriously, that pizza!), stunning scenery, thoughtful accessibility, and a genuinely welcoming atmosphere. It's not a pretentious, stuffy hotel; it's a place where you can relax, unwind, and indulge in the simple pleasures of life: good food, beautiful surroundings, and a sense of peace.
Go. Just go. And order the pizza. You won't regret it. I’m already planning my return!
Luxury Escapes Await: Unveiling Hotel BKBG, Lomé's Hidden Gem
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because we're about to dive headfirst into my Swiss adventure at the legendary (or so I've heard, Google reviews are a fickle mistress) Hotel Pizzeria Selva in Zernez. This isn't your pristine, perfectly-polished travelogue. This is the real, slightly-panicked, utterly-enthralled me, in all my glory. Consider this my messy, emotional, and probably-incoherent diary of deliciousness and potential disaster.
Day 1: Arrival of Cheese Dreams and Altitude Anxiety
Morning (8:00 AM - 1:00 PM): The Great Getaway and the Train that Almost Wasn't
- So, flight from London was a chaotic mess, naturally. Delayed by an hour because someone, ahem, forgot their passport. Seriously, who does that?! Thankfully, managed to catch the connecting train to Zernez from Zurich with about two minutes to spare! Sweating bullets. My luggage, however, is currently MIA. Praying to the Swiss cheese gods that it turns up. I packed ALL my sensible walking boots in there.
- The train ride! Pure poetry, even though I couldn't understand a word of the announcements. Just the stunning landscapes and the vague smell of chocolate that was very soothing. That was my moment to breathe and realize I was here.
- Observation: Those Swiss cows. Seriously, they're like, perfectly contoured, like they've been styled by a Swiss supermodel. And the bells! The constant tinkling is either incredibly charming or will drive me absolutely bonkers. Jury's still out.
Afternoon (1:00 PM - 5:00 PM): Selva Check-In and a Pizza Pilgrimage
- Finally, arrived at the Selva! Let me tell you, it's not quite the dazzling, five-star experience I'd initially imagined. More like…rustic charm? The lobby is a bit of a mish-mash of wood paneling, old ski posters, and what I think is a stuffed ibex head. The owner, bless her heart, greeted me with a thick Swiss accent and a smile that could probably melt glacial ice. She seemed absolutely lovely, albeit a bit flustered.
- Moment of Truth: Pizza time! The reputation precedes it. Honestly, I was starving. The "Selva Special" was the first order of business. Oh. My. Holy. Cheese. It was a symphony of melting goodness, with a crust that had this perfect, wood-fired char. I had a whole pizza (embarrassingly), then instantly regretted it! However, the view from the pizzeria window was breathtaking – mountains and trees that went forever.
- Imperfection: Almost choked on a rogue olive pit. Seriously considered a dramatic exit. Had to discreetly spit it into my napkin. Professional tourist, over and out.
Evening (5:00 PM - 9:00 PM): Altitude Adjustment and Attempted Hiking (Failed):
- Started the day with a nap, and was immediately struck with a headache, I think it must be altitude sickness! So, I walked around town. Felt like a tiny, slow person surrounded by efficient, fast Swiss people. Decided to try a hike! I had this grand vision of myself, conquering a mountain like a majestic eagle. Turns out, I’m more of a slightly-out-of-breath seagull.
- Quirky Observation: Swiss children are dressed in the loveliest, most practical outdoor gear! Their parents obviously got the memo that I, clearly, missed.
- Emotional Reaction: I was incredibly tired after my failed hike; I went back to my room, drank a glass of water, and realized how utterly amazing it was to be in Switzerland.
- Rambling Moment: I wonder what the people who live here do all day. Are they always this well-turned out? Do they get altitude sickness? Is there a secret underground society of cheese connoisseurs? These are the important questions, people.
Day 2: The Bernina Express And The Quest For The Perfect Apfelstrudel
Morning (9:00 AM - 1:00 PM): The Bernina Express: A Rolling Masterpiece
- Woke up slightly terrified of altitude sickness. But, the day has arrived! The Bernina Express! This is a train journey that everybody seems to agree is the most scenic train ride in the world. The thought alone made me emotional.
- This absolutely blew my mind! Glaciers, crazy-looking bridges, tunnels that seemed to go on forever. The train climbed through the mountains in a way that seemed impossible! One of the highlights was the Brusio spiral viaduct. It was breathtaking.
- Opinionated Language: Seriously, if you visit Switzerland and don't take this train, you're basically committing a travel crime! It's pure, unadulterated, gorgeous-ness.
Afternoon (1:00 PM - 5:00 PM): Tirano (Italy) and Tragic Return
- We crossed into Italy! It was a bit of a culture shock! The train stopped in Tirano and allowed us ample time to step out, and I decided to get lunch! Pasta, pizza, all the good stuff! The food was amazing, and the town truly stunning, and then it was time to get back on the Bernina Express.
- Stronger Emotional Reaction: I almost missed the train back and had a full-blown panic attack. I was convinced I was going to be stranded in Italy forever! Traumatizing! I made it back on, thankfully.
- Messier Structure: I spent most of the ride back in a daze, trying to process the near-death experience.
Evening (5:00 PM - 9:00 PM): Apfelstrudel and Reflection in Zernez
- Spent ages scouring the cafes of Zernez for Apfelstrudel. Had one, and whilst it delivered on the apple, it didn’t quite live up to my expectations, it was good, but not the life-altering experience I'd been promised.
- Wandered through the village. It's so peaceful, a place you could happily lose yourself for a while.
- Doubling Down on the Experience! The rest of the evening was pretty much dominated by cheese. I've become intimately familiar with the cheese selection. I had another pizza (surprise!), and spent some time chatting with locals.
- Stream-of-Consciousness: Is this the life? Is this what "living the dream" feels like? Or am I just a cheese-obsessed, perpetually-lost tourist with a questionable sense of direction and a fear of missing trains? Probably the latter. But hey, at least the pizza's good.
Day 3: Departure (But Not Without a Final Slice)
- Morning (8:00 AM - 10:00 AM): A Final Selva Breakfast and Pizza Goodbye
- Checked out, said goodbye to the lovely, slightly-flustered owner, leaving with a big smile.
- One last breakfast with a view, and finally, a pizza. One last slice of cheesy paradise.
- Got on the train, hoping to find my luggage at the airport.
- Honest and Funny: I am convinced I’ll dream of cheese and trains for weeks after this.
This is it. Switzerland, Selva, and my own epic saga. It's been messy, emotional, and utterly unforgettable. I'm exhausted. I'm full of cheese. And I wouldn't have it any other way.
Escape to Paradise: Il Poggio Dei Pettirossi Awaits in Italy!
Hotel Pizzeria Selva: The Pizza That Nearly Broke Me (In a Good Way!) - FAQ's...and Ramblings!
So, WHAT'S the big deal about this Selva pizza everyone's raving about? Seriously?
Alright, buckle up buttercup, because this ain't just *any* pizza. This is... well, it's borderline spiritual, okay? It's that Selva pizza. Look, I've eaten my fair share of cardboard-y pizza. I've endured the cheesy horrors of late-night delivery. But Selva's? It's a religious experience. Crisp crust, bubbling cheese, the *smell* alone... It's like being hugged by a warm cloud of oregano and happiness. Honestly? I almost shed a tear the first time. (I'm a softie, alright?)
Are they *really* that good? Like, better than that place in Naples everyone keeps blathering on about?
Okay, okay, deep breath. Here's the brutally honest truth: I've never actually *been* to Naples. Sue me. (Although, if they're reading this... send pizza? Please?) But, and this is a HUGE but, comparing Selva to every other pizza I've had in *Europe*? Yeah. Yeah, they're giving Naples a run for its money. Maybe. Look, I'm just saying... I wouldn't be surprised if some pizza gods were secretly involved. And listen – I have a friend, a pizza snob, who only eats Neapolitan, and even *he* begrudgingly admitted it was "decent." Decent?! That's high praise, folks!
What kind of pizza should I order? Help! I'm overwhelmed!
Oh, the agony of choice! This is where I, your pizza-loving guide, step in. First off: do *not* be basic and just get a Margherita. Yes, it's good. But it's not *Selva* good. My advice? Get the Funghi. Seriously. It usually has some perfect combination of mushroom, with cheese and a drizzle (I think it was truffle oil, or something just as decadent). If you're feeling brave, try the "Pizza with Sausage". That sausage? It's phenomenal. Honestly, the pizza is all amazing, I just keep ordering the Funghi. Is that boring? Probably. But am I regretting it? Never! **Important Note:** Don't be afraid to ask for a special. The staff are super chill and sometimes, they'll have a pizza of the day that's off-menu, and usually amazing. And be prepared to share, okay? Because you *will* want to eat the whole thing yourself. Don't fight it. It's okay to feel that way. Also, have you tried the pizza bread? Get the garlic bread! (okay maybe not with the Funghi, but still!).
Can I get the pizza delivered? I'm staying in Zurich (or, you know, the moon, whatever).
Listen, I get it. The craving is real. The pizza-longing is a sickness. But... unless you're willing to charter a private jet and bribe the pilots with promises of free pizza slices, the answer is, sadly, no. No delivery. You gotta go to Zernez. You gotta *experience* the magic of Selva in its natural habitat. And you know what? That's part of the charm. It's a journey. Think of it as a pilgrimage to the pizza gods. I'd drive! (and I hate driving)
What if they're busy? Is there a wait? My stomach is rumbling just *thinking* about this pizza!
Okay, let's be honest. Selva is popular. REALLY popular. Sometimes, yes, you might have to wait. And trust me, the wait feels *agonizingly* long when you're salivating like a rabid dog. My first time, I arrived during a ski season rush (a rookie mistake, I know). I waited, probably about an hour, nursing a beer, watching other people gleefully devour their slices. TORTURE. But, listen. It's worth it. Absolutely worth it. Think of it as a pre-pizza contemplation period. A time to mentally prepare for the pizza onslaught. Or better yet, call ahead, make a reservation! I wasn't smart enough to do that.
Is the rest of the Hotel Pizzeria good? I mean, besides the pizza...
Look, I'm not gonna lie. I'm there for the pizza. I've tried a salad. It was fine. I've grabbed a beer. Good beer selection. The service? Friendly, efficient, and dealing with a constant wave of pizza-crazed lunatics (like myself!). The atmosphere? Warm and inviting, it's a cozy spot after skiing or hiking. But let's be real. You're there for the pizza. Everything else is just a bonus. A delicious, cheesy, crispy bonus. The hotel portion? Haven't been. But if the pizza is any indication, it's probably fantastic!
Alright, alright, you've convinced me. But what if I hate pizza?
You...hate pizza? I...I don't even... Look, I don't even know what to say. I'm so sorry. I truly, deeply, honestly, feel for you. Perhaps you should consider seeking professional help? Or maybe just... try it. Just one slice. You might just be converted. And if not... well, at least you can say you tried. But I still think you should get help. And perhaps a strong drink beforehand. To fortify yourself.
This sounds expensive though, right? The mystical pizza demands a hefty price tag?
Nope! Surprisingly, the price is reasonable. It isn't the cheapest pizza you'll ever have, let's be real. It's a "treat". But for the quality and sheer, unadulterated deliciousness, it's a steal. You're basically getting a hug from a pizza, and who can put a price on that? Consider it an investment in your happiness. And your taste buds. Both very worthwhile endeavors. Seriously though, you'll pay more for a subpar pizza at a chain restaurant, I bet.
Okay, one last question. What if I'm a terrible person? Can even I eat this pizza?
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